The BMS Syndrome

Most females suffer from PMS! Fortunately, I have been spared of the monthly torture 98% of the womenfolk go through (it helps to be in the minority in some cases).

However, when God opens one pathway for you, he also clogs another one just to achieve a compensating effect (this is applicable to all scenarios).
Hence, he gave me a deadlier battle to face- BMS!! I can almost see all your brows raising in thought . Well- BMS also known as Buy More Shoes!!

It’s a syndrome which we can safely conclude as having reached epidemic proportions. However, very few girls/women will even acknowledge it and will continue to live forever burying their faces in fresh shoe bags in denial.
However, I shall accept that I am a BMS victim. In hindsight, I cannot place my finger on any one point when my obsession originated. However, there has been a consistent growth trajectory.

Phase A- For the longest time in my growing years- I was a tomboy who thought sneakers were the coolest thing to happen to mankind. You wouldn’t have caught me dead or crawling in sandals or heels. And when your tall and learning Bharatnatyam – heels are definitely on the banned item list-Schedule 1.

Phase B- The wonder teen years- When your not making your own money- you just wear what your folks get you (I already sense a generation gap on this). This phase was marked by awkward Bata footwear and cheap maal from Bandra Linking Road apart from what the parents provided. I did discover sandals as I did nail polish in this phase. (toerings also- a trend I wish I had not followed). The love affair with sneakers continued though.

Phase C- The 20-25 years stage- the coming of age stage. Well once it was established I was not going to get any taller (I stand at 5 feet 9 inches), buying shoes became the safest investment really. It was better than clothes as your shoe size doesn’t stand to vary unlike your weight.
Buying shoes is like buying art. You may like many pieces but you will not spend until you get that right fit and heel. Considering I fall under the tall giant category, most shoes are not made keeping my height in mind. To avoid looking right out of Gullivers Travels, I need to make a conscientious effort in choosing the right amount of heel. I dare not venture higher than 2 inches.
I sigh at the sight of pretty shoes in well lit showrooms. New shoes get me out of a bad mood- similar to how ice cream or chocolates would work on an average person. I love cleaning my shoe collection even when they are all clean.
To clarify, I am not into high end shoes- the Choos , Blahniks and Louboutins do not even interest me. I think any pair of shoes should not cost more than Rs 2,000- be it sports or strappy or evening wear. Blame the Indian mentality- but I love a good bargain. Nothing delights me more than the four letter word’ SALE’ screaming out to me via newspapers or smses.

I recall this one time I was assigned on a client on the outskirts of Pune. Any professional shopaholic can tell you- that the first day of the sale is the day when you have access to the crème’ of the stock. My sale plus shoe combined obsession led to manipulative tendencies where in I sold a hackneyed story to my unsuspecting client of how I had a friends engagement to attend and had to be in the city by 8 pm. Needless to say, I ran away at 6.30 p.m and reached the mall at 8 p.m just 30 minutes short of closing time on the first day of sale- and the adrenalin rush I felt on having reached the destination before the shutters fell was unbelievable.

Additionally, I remember how in 2009- I lugged back shoes and sandals from Bangkok in every color I wear. They didn’t last too long which has made me wiser about quality and not going in for too much of a bargain either.

Much to my parents dismay- I have made it imperative that I need a partner who is atleast a six footer. 5’11’’ will not make the cut as I wear 2 inch heels and I just cannot be the same height as my partner. (I don’t understand the Katie Holmes/ Nicole Kidman school of thought of being taller than your partner either). Plus what would become of all my dear shoes with heels then?!!
My ROI (return on investment) in them would turn negative!!!

Well, to look on the brighter side, it is a mercy that I don’t feel the same way about clothes. :))